Thanks for the giving

So, I'm feeling much better now. A lot of the stress I was feeling has passed because the projects have been completed (up to the point they were required to be by now).

I tried my first "case" last week. I was working for the prosecution and the three juries found the defendant guilty. Mostly, I was just happy I didn't sound like an idiot and I got a lot of compliments from the mock juries. Mind you, they were all jurors under the age of 20. But, it was still a good feeling.

Also, I did my first power point presentation yesterday too. It was a presentation on my Gender and the Law paper for class. I got a little good feedback from that, too. I don't really remember much about my presentation but it finished. I didn't get a lot of feedback, so it's hard to tell how it went over. So, that is that.

Now it's the Thanksgiving break and I've realized that I have about a week until I turn 30 and then two weeks until finals. HOPEFULLY (but really not likely) I will use these three days effectively.

Hopefully you all know how much you have to be thankful for. I am thankful for all of you and the love you give me.

Watching oneself implode is hard

I have had a long two weeks which shouldn't have been so long. Therefore, I self imploded at some point and have completely stopped caring. And, if I have a headache for one more day, I will probably use a dull instrument to dig it out from behind my eyes...

Really, I am starting to feel like a lot of the reasons I have confidence in myself are not actually valid, as far as law school goes -- not the rest of my life. But, maybe it's simply because I have been so scattered for the last month and a half that I haven't really put my full capabilities into anything so nothing can be good. However, this is cause for concern because eventually in the real world I will have to be able to effectively juggle a lot of different projects at once. If I can't do it when I'm in school, will I be able to do it in the real world? Maybe, I'm just sitting in a small puddle of self-pity and I'll be better by next week, hopefully.

Oh, and I realized last night that I am old when compared to a large number of people at school with me. I just wished two people happy 23rd birthdays on Tuesday...screw them and their stupid youth and having their whole lives in front of them. They have no experience or knowledge of the real world. So, screw them and their ability to drink without getting a day long hang over!!!!!

Plus, only one other person at a table of 10 people had heard of "Shirt Tales" which made me sad because it was before everyone else's time of cartoon watching (in age, not in the day). They all knew the stupid Care Bears and Friends, though...

Bah, this has to be my whiniest post ever, so sorry. Thanks for listening though.

Right now I think that I should give myself the day off because I'm disinterested in everything. Maybe five straight hours of TV is what I need to get over the hump...

I'm alright

I am sure some of you have heard about all the fires in the area around me. I just wanted to give a quick note to say I'm alright. I'll update more later.

Love to everyone!

Booty & Plunder

I decided to call this post booty & plunder because my only other option (in my head) was AHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I have so much to do, so little time in which to do it, and an unshakable feeling that I'm forgetting something. This week is my holy-heck week because of everything I really need to get done and the limited amount of self directed time in which to do. The culmination of the last few weeks of frustration will come to the proverbial head this week, ending on Sunday, or maybe even Monday. Then I will have to refocus on everything else that I have been ignoring in order to get the rest of this stuff done with, like school.

I think that I've finally decided to officially sell-out. Now if only I could find the darn paperwork...

PS I am a horrible speller.

PPS You probably already knew that.

PPPS Yesterday before class I stated loud enough for most of my classmates to hear "Put down the crackpipe of separation." You figure it out...

Jumping through hoops, just because

So, I've taken on even more stress intentionally, and I'm pissed off about how other people are handling it. Not the boy, the boy says "Do what you want to because I love and support you.", which is refreshing. Others are saying "We don't think that you've proven yourself capable because we're bitter about things as related to our lives, and we think that you cannot conceive of a way to balance your own life." To them I say "NUTS TO YOU."

I've been all over the place emotionally and rage wise, and I've consistently woken up four hours after I go to bed having similarly frightening dreams about these things that are bothering me. They never end well, and sometimes I don't fall back asleep for an hour. Therefore, I am frustrated and sleep deprived. Someone told me yesterday it was like I have been dunked into the bitter soup and seem to be very mean about very petty things (particularly near strangers at law school). It's true, but I've sort of stopped caring, which bothers me. I used to care a lot, and now I don't. I am therefore declaring myself "bitter cakes" and will work on the recipe.

Random side note, I think I understand where the phrase "Nuts to you" may come from. Apparently really long meals with many courses started with soup and ended with nuts (thus "from soup to nuts"). So perhaps saying "nuts to you" is like saying I'm done with you/this and the meal is over, please leave my parlor.

And, I'm certain that no one is reading this anymore, but if you are, notice how often I've posted for the last few weeks. Aren't you proud?

PS My niece is growing and she is still the cutest in all the land. She's as big as her stuffed pig now!

Today the TV taught me

So, a commercial told me that there are three types of fiber:

1) Soluble
2) Insoluble
3) Fermenting

What they failed to explain to me is:

a) why fermenting is neither soluble or insoluble
b) why I should care about fermenting fiber

All I know is that I'm guessing "fermenting" will now replace "gassy" in my lexicon, cause I'm guessing that's what they were trying to say. And that amuses me beyond reasonableness, as defined by an objective or subjective standard.

P.S. Discrimination against women based on their role as child-care provider harms women, men, and employers. Ask me how if you care to hear a bunch of B.S. (which is also the abbreviation for Balance Sheet, and that tells you all you need to know about corporate financial reporting). T.V. taught me neither of these things.

How do you politely ask someone to...

... not type on their laptop so loud that it echos throughout the desks and over the Beatles in my headphones?

... stop chewing crunchy items that are so loud I can hear you eating 50 feet away?

... to not be a f***-tard?

I am in one of those places where everything is coming down at once. So, my plan is to not to sleep until 10am. Ohh, poor me, I have to get up a normal hour that the vast majority of people get up at everyday in the real world. But, in all seriousness, I am swamped and frustrated by some lack of support by "partners" in the efforts. Perhaps my control-freak nature has a bad flip side in that way that I do so much that I create an expectation in the other person that they don't need to do anything. Also, some people are worse then me and only seek allies in their desire to be a belabored hard-worker, but in reality, they tied their own noose and I don't care about their complaints, but I need the stuff they're supposed to have done.

And I'm taking a class which is called "Gender in the Law" which could be awesome if a) some classmates would start talking more; b) some classmates would stop talking; or c) the class could be limited to the Professor (on whom I have a major girl crush) and one other student who is awesome (I may also have a girl crush on her, but she and her husband seems okay with that). Right now we're switching from sexual harassment to domestic violence. The reading assignments aren't all that fun. But, I do see how lucky I am to have not been confronted with a lot of these issues (or at least not yet) and even luckier that there are smart people out there writing smart articles which make it obvious for many otherwise stupid people as to why such things are a) more complicated than simple violence/anger; b) why victimization is about asserting power; c) not being addressed in the current law; and d) actually are issues of public policy and not simple private issues that need to be resolved privately.

Okay, enough of my ranting, I must go do stuff for things.

So now I am waiting...

Well, I submitted about 50 applications for clearkships on the 4th. The federal court rules require that the judges wait until the 19th to arrange interviews with anyone who is still currently in school. So, I have heard from NONE...maybe because they didn't want to talk to me like a pirate?

Umm, other than that I am not putting the effort into my classes this semester that I should be. It's a tie between a) laziness, b) part-time scheduling, and c) procrastination as to why I'm not focused, but seeing as I know that why haven't I fixed it?

Oh, and when did co-coordinators of an event lead to one person doing all the work? Not because I want to but out of a sense of obligation to get crap taken care of I'm the one that has to do it. This makes me frustrated both with myself and with the other people who are supposed to be my "team." Also, it inevitably leads to me failing to get some things taken care of, which really really sucks.

Really, I just want to doing nothing all the time and sleeping through most of the day. But that's probably just the allergies talking (they give me a nasty headache all day).

Now I need to snack...

What do you do...

Okay, so I officially know that I'm not "cool" because I've worked at the library on Friday and Saturday night two out of the last three weekends and I'm excited to be awake in time to watch Meet the Press. So, based on that, I'm gonna get a little "political" here because I want to.

I'm very irritated with a lot of the talk about Iraq right now because the knee jerk reaction of "out now" is not a good policy but continuing down the current path will fix nothing in that area or here at home. First of all, I've never thought being there is a good idea, but it's too late know to change that choice because we've been there for five years (good lord, that's a long time) so arguing about it is pointless. But the debate we should be having, outside of the standard sound bite wars of campaigning, is about how we make the country less un-whole than it currently is.

There are real consequences for pulling out now: if we leave now we show the world what we don't stand for. Regardless of the possibility of terrorists taking hold or the foreign fighters coming into Iraq, if we simply pull all of our troops out instantly we would live a ginormous mess and civil war which we are largely to blame for starting. The message that sends to most other nations are detrimental to our reputation in the international world when there are other missions we declare must be fought -- like if we finally pulled our president's head out of his pooper and determined to stop the genocide in Dafur -- what other nations will follow our lead into those more legitimate actions? Moreover, removing Saddam was never a bad thing, but pulling out now will leave the potential for an equally bloody reign of sectarian rule in the opposite of Saddam's violence. There are people there who need to be protected, and until there is evidence that the powers that be in Iraq understand and agree, we must provide local officials and the armies with the training to help.

However, continuing down the path that we're currently undertaking is not going to ever be effective and only lead the the death of more men and women, both U.S. citizens and Iraqi. Those consequences are unacceptable. However, the path that I think needs to be travelled seems to be impossible. How do you find a political leadership that will protect all Iraqi's rights in an area that is full of people who have had a blood feud for more than a thousand years? That is a question that we can't even answer when the anger is a mere fifty years in development. I have no idea what the answer is to this concern, but it is the question that we should be addressing. The other issue we should be addressing is what the mission our troops should be completing. They cannot be the only protection within the cities, country, and borders, there just aren't enough of them. And, while most of the experts who have reported from Iraq have stated that the Iraqi military is prepared and capable of doing more, the sectarian concerns have bled into the discussion of their effectiveness.

I have no idea what should be done, but what I want is a serious discussion in the public sphere of these issues instead of sound bites and the debate that should have taken place FIVE YEARS AGO.

Now, to totally change the topic, last night I was confronted with the following situation:
I was at work at the library, and a guy who is there daily doing research who insists upon taking to me to much told me he didn't like going to D.C. There are a lot of reasons which I would understand as to why, so I asked him "Why don't you like to go to D.C.?" And his response was "First of all, there are too many black people for me."
HOW THE HELL SHOULD I RESPOND TO THAT? What I did was look away and pretty much stop talking because I had no idea what else to do. While I could rationalize my reaction a number of insufficient ways, I realized that it is because I am completely uncomfortable with confronting such an attitude. I am embarrassed about that.

Other than that, same old, same old.

Go BEARS!

So thin, my time that is

So, I have definitely spread myself too thin. I am not surprised that I have done this (it's been a constant theme in law school), but I am shocked by how quickly I've realized it this semester. Based on my yearly plan to improve my time management skills, I am constantly updating my calendar and to do list as I realize what all I need to get finished, only to realize that I spend as much time writing down what I need to accomplish as accomplishing it. That is not good time management. If anyone has suggestions, I'm open to them.

Right now, I'm procrastinating the writing of my cover letters for my judicial applications. They all must be accomplished by September 4. I have finished 0 of 70. That is not a good ratio. Also, the career services people seem to be not helpful because they're moving offices again. They got booted from their space in the middle of the summer and didn't get to move back in until last week making them hard to get a hold of and not as responsive as they want to be. I don't like it at all.

Never mind the fact that my parents are coming to visit this weekend, so I won't have as much time to work on my applications as I originally hoped. Stupid not getting things done...

School has started. I've been in class for a week. Somehow I managed to get myself a schedule where I only have Thursday off, but I have to come to school for office hours anyway. How on earth did I manage that while I'm only going part time? Still, it should be a good semester. One paper (30+ pages on gender and the law -- can we say "Erin will be more disgruntled with the man this semester"?); one "trial" (it's a mock trial and the course is a pass/fail class); and two finals (one open book, one closed book). That sound reasonable. Now if only I could sit down and figure out what I want to write my paper on...

I'm also dog sitting this week for a dog who cannot hear. It's strange because I'm in someone else house and no one else is there. Normally, I would talk to the dog, but I feel weird doing that since I know she can't hear me. Also, in order to get her attention, I have to put my hand in front of her nose and then start petting her. It makes me sad because I like this dog and it means she's getting very old.

As for my niece, she is the tiniest little thing and she is still struggling to gain wait. I will post a picture when I take the time to download them from my camera (can you say "Lazy"?). My sister is one of the strongest people I know and is struggling to be okay with all of this. She seems to think that because the baby isn't breast feeding well, she is a failure as a mom, especially if she decides quits trying to breast feed. I think that she is a great mom and I am sad that she doubts herself. However, I have not been in her shoes so I don't know how to tell her that she is doing great without sounding patronizing.

On a lighter note, my mom says my niece looks like me, but mostly because she's a gassy baby who squishes up her face to fart, which apparently I did a lot as a baby, too. Aren't you glad you know that about me now?

So, the real question is, does anyone read this half-arsed attempt at blogging?

Sometimes, when I'm drifting into a daydream I start thinking about the cartoon version of Alice in Wonderland and wonder why that movie didn't unsettle me as much as Dumbo (pink elephants on parade scene) or Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (through the LSD tunnel scene -- original "Gene Wilder on cocaine" version) did when I was a kid.

Later.

Not dead, but laptop was

Okay, so first of all, I want to say, I'm am sorry that I haven't updated in two months, but my computer and it's manufacturer made it impossible to use it or fix the problems the first time. So, in honor of that here is a list of things that I really don't like right now:

1. Websites that say a certain part works for your stuff, but it doesn't and could ruin it instead
2. The fact that I still purchase things from those websites
3. Drivers who leave their blinker on and drive that way
4. Drivers who think that a blinker on for half a blink is sufficient notice to "merge" in front of me
5. Vapid "reality" tv people
6. The fact that I find people who qualify for #5 addictive to watch
7. Drivers who drive 60 mph when the speed limit is 65 mph for NO REASON (sometimes even when they do it for a reason)
8. My time management skills
9. Parking spaces marked "compact" which aren't, they're smaller
10. People in SUVs who park in "compact"

So, here's the super skinny:
I got glasses because I can't see things at distances (but it's not too bad, but it helps).

I have sold out and I love what I am doing this summer.

I got in a car accident at 5 mph and the lady called my insurance to "fix" her car and then, after she got an estimate, her insurance company said it was too small a claim to deal with (HAHAHA).

My sister had a baby girl who is in the hospital because she is too small and needs to learn to eat before she can leave the hospital. I have only seen pictures of her, but she is cute as pie (but I'm not biased at all). I am going to visit her and her family in early August. I am constantly thinking about her.

I am working toward applying for a judicial clerkship for post graduation.

I have stretched myself too thin for the summer and for next school year. Neither of those things are all that surprising to me.

I have had a headache for three days.

I have not finished Harry Potter book seven yet, but the fifth movie was awesome.

Love to you all. I'll try to update more when I can.

Mystery & Jeopardy are the best TV shows on TV.

Done with finals...

So, four finals in 8 days. None of them seemed like I particularly did great. I realized I left out a major issue on one, but five days later. Not the best feeling in the world. I don't think that I flunked anything, but I really don't know if I did great on anything either. I really wanted to do well on one or two, just so I felt good about this semester, but I didn't and that annoys me.

Now, I am driving home so that I can get the car's license renewed. In honor of that I had Dusty washed. She was dirty within hours. All I did was park her in her assigned space under the roof. So, of course she got dirty. I have to drive her home because I have to get an air quality test done, and that means the car needs to be there. Since I don't get to take any vacation during the 10 weeks I'm working this summer, I need to do it in the week long break I get. Fortunately, the boy is coming with me and will probably do most the driving. I love driving, but I don't get to look around when I do it. Hopefully, I will have a chance to take some photos along the way and enjoy the drive in at least one direction.

But, I do have to come back before my sister and her husband flies in. I am excited that she's coming because it's the first time she's been able to come to SD since I moved here, and I get to see her when she's more visibly preggers. It is very exciting to me.

I am glad that school is done because I'm getting a little burnt out, but part of me feels like I could stay in school for a long time. We will see, because I got a ton of loans to repay now. Still, I don't know what I would want to focus on academically, so I need to figure all that out first. It's weird thinking about my future and being so unsure about what I want.

My toenails hurt because my cleats are too tights with my inserts.

What I'm doing instead of studying or writing anyone back

Okay, so I'm gonna start with this question: do any of you out there in blogger land know how I want to be proposed to? Yesterday, as we were driving to soccer, the boy asked me if I had any friends that would know how I wanted to be proposed to. I answered no, because I don't think that I have a conception of the whole process. All I know is that I think (for goodness knows what archaic reason) that I want him to ask my dad first. I think he was really just testing the waters to see if all of my jokes about him marrying me lately were really a sign that the concept of marriage does not really send me into a minor panic attack any more. (It does, but a lot less and I can hide it better then I used to.)

So, today, while I'm sitting in the library with nothing but a week and a half until finals, I am surfing the internet to look at wedding venues. Now, don't get all a-twitter, I am not actually engaged, nor has a proposal been made, nor do I expect that I'll be near tying that knot soon, but for some reason it seemed like a relatively okay thing to do. I think it has something to do with the time of year and the increasing number of conversations that turn to the weddings that people need to attend/plan over the summer, but really, why would I google it? Oh, wait I know, because the wiki-how link for today was how to find a wedding dress which I clicked on because the whole process is one for which I have no real idea as to its inner-workings. So, the internet is why I will fail two of my four classes. I'm sure that I'll find a reason for the other two, but it will probably have more to do with the 15 shows that are on the DVR at home. (I don't have the fancy name-brand Tivo, but when it works the DVR is just fine.)

I am also listening to my music collection by artist and I realized that there are a lot of songs that make me cry (or at least tear up) no matter when or where I hear them. It's more of a problem when I'm sitting here looking at random things on the internet in the middle of a public library where other people tend to sneak up behind me and I'm near tears. But I have to say that Harry Chapin tells some of the most tragic simple stories that break my heart every time I hear them, so the tears in my eyes are reasonable. He had such a direct tap on the vein of human-ness that it's strikingly sad when he touches on the offhanded crap that life dishes out and we dish to ourselves that cut us to the quick. On the other hand, he also had an ability to explain love in a real and wonderful way that you hope that when you're old, you feel the way his songs express. If you haven't heard anything from him (which you have because he wrote "Cats in the Cradle"), and you like storytellers with simple music, I really suggest you look him up. Or maybe I can send you some tracks from his "Greatest Stories" album, which would help me procrastinate more.

I have also been really cranky with people lately. Since about spring break as a matter of fact. It just gets worse the more I have to deal with people on a regular basis. I just think that some people should be told to shut up more often because they should STOP TALKING for a little while so the rest of us can relax. They aren't helping anyone and aren't the only ones with ideas which are relevant. Also, learning to park your big fat SUV that cost more than my tuition (which is obscene, by the way) should be a requirement to get into USD, but it clearly isn't. That's why when I tapped your car when I pulled in I didn't leave a note (also the fact that I did no damage and the mark wiped off).

On a final note, after nearly two years of driving my fabulous contour around, I have named her. She shall be known as Dusty. This in not just because I never wash her (even when I do wash her she's dusty within hours). It also comes from her slightly alternative approach to looks and defrosting the front windshield. She's also reliable and fun to be in, so Dusty just seemed right...I'd share pictures, but well, that takes planning to have a camera with me, which I never do.

Okay, I really need to do SOMETHING before the end of my time in the library...I'm sure the internet will provide you with further entertainment elsewhere. I'll probably give you an update post finals, but you never know with me.

Nubbins is just plain fun to say.

Avoiding the real work

So, one of the bigger projects for the spring semester is over and done with, and the banquet was last night. It was a "moot court competition" which is a bunch of not yet lawyers write an appellate brief and then make oral arguments in a appellate court setting. It is strangely fun to do and I think that its work that I would enjoy doing when I am a real lawyer.

Now, I have the biggest paper due on Monday at 5pm, and I am not working on it because I am afraid and bored.

But, I'm alive.

That is all.

Groundhog's Day

So, in honor of this long overlooked holiday (and a day late) I thought that I would try to stick my head out of my hole to determine what the future is. Turns out I'm not psychic. Instead, I can only give you the recent past...

My parents met the boy's parents. I think it went well, but I don't see a bond like my parents have with my sister's husbands parents. Which is very much what I suspected, and I really think that I'm okay with that.

Seeing as the parents met, it would make sense that one set traveled near the the other, which is, in fact what happened. My parents came to Santa Monica where my dad was for a conference. It's about 20 minutes north of LA. So, while my dad was at the conference, the boy and I took my mom and spent the day at the Getty Museum . Wow. I got through four exhibits, of the about 30 that they have. Two were on photography in the US. I developed a deeper taste for this art and think there are some peoples stuff that I would like to see more of including: Mitch Epstein, Sheron Rupp, and Donald Blumberg (to name but a few). Additionally, they had an exhibit about art from Dresden, which lead me to discover a new artist that I would like to see more of: Gerhard Richter.

I also saw someone famous at the museum (I am fairly sure), but I didn't say anything to him because I was looking for Rembrandt and well, I'm sure that the actor was there for something other than adoration (or at least pointing and signature asking). He was a lot skinner in person than he looks on TV, and scruffier.

School is sucking my time down the drain and my grades last semester were not what I wanted them to be, but only in one class really. But it was the 4 credit class, so it weighs more heavily. Of course. I sort of knew it was coming, though, I was just hoping for better. This semester is a lot of work and I constantly feel about a step behind. The problem with that is that instead of catching up, I know I'm just going to slowly slip further behind. Stupid stuff to do...

And my fingers smell like garlic.

Procrastination

So, really I should be writing part of the 40 page paper that I need to have a full draft of done by Monday, but I don't wanna. I thought what better use of my time then to update my blog. I don't really have anything to say, but I thought that I'd check in with whoever is left reading this.

To the update-mobile!

Classes have started for real. I have yet to fall behind on the day-to-day readings, which really shouldn't be that much of an accomplishment as I have only had five days of classes, but I am me and I do get behind on occassion. I just fake it real good when I need to look on top of the world.

My grades were due to be turned in by professors by today. As of 5:30 pm I had no grades. Most people have one or two, and some have all, of their grades by now and I have none. I am concerned and totally obsessed. A good student this does not make...I am also paranoid that something happened and my grades did not come through and I'll have gone through an entire semester of school and not get any credit for that. How's that for paranoia.

My parents are coming to southern California this weekend, which is kind of inconvient because of the paper, but I am glad that I get to see them sooner rather than later. There is also the possibility that my parents will meet the boys parents, but nothing is solidified for that, so we shall see. It is a big step in my mind becuase my parents have never met a boy's parents while I was dating said boy. Largely because my dad believes there is a time for such things and one had not been reached by me until now. That's scary to me. However, I have never lived with a boy before either and that seems to be okay except for the burden sharing of chores and payment. I do one, he does the other. It seems unbalanced, but I can only expect sharing on one half because I am still in school.

I had a really great two hour conversation with the professor I TA for about what she wants to do with her life and what she did before she became a professor. It was really cool because I had never talked to her like that before, even though she took me to a San Diego Chargers football game. It's somehow comforting to know that even people who are much older than me are still trying to figure out what to do next. Oh, and it is helpful to remember that professors are real people who sometimes do stupid things too.

And GO BEARS!

January Part 1

So, I spent my New Years Eve in sweatpants playing a videogame with the boy. Not my usual stellar performance but I enjoyed it a lot. I did talk to a few people, mostly family, as the new years washed across the states each in their appropriate time zone. Some were sober, some were not. It was good to hear each of their voices for a lot of different reasons. However, I did get a little sad that I didn't get to spend the night with my friends or family (not that I didn't love spending the time with the boy, but you know what I mean). I have said (probably more often than necessary) that I think that New Years Eve is the holiday you spend with whomever you choose. Most people spend Thanksgiving and the winter holiday of their persuasion with family if it is possible, but New Years is not so much a family tradition but an excuse for everyone to hang out with people that they love who don't know what you looked like when you were zero years old, if that's what they want. Over the last two years, I have not really gotten a choice in where I was. This year I could have gone out (if I was made of money), but hanging out with drunken strangers is not my idea of a fun New Years Eve. I get very sad for the many friends that I have and rarely see over this period.

Not that I write or call any of you, but I do miss you none the less.

About a week later I went home to visit my parents. I had an awesome time because my parents love and adore me and ply me with more wine than is recommended by so-called doctors. I seriously drank more with my parents than I had over the entire semester. I don't know what that says about my drinking during the semester or what that says about my time with my family. But, it wasn't like we were drinking for the purpose of drinking -- it was before/with/after dinner drinks of wine which makes it okay. I did get to see some friends who have know me since my awkward teen years (lord help me and them) and saw the possibility that we are growing up into adults. How scary is that?
I also got into an argument about whiskey with the youngest son of the friends of the family who I could have sworn is 12, but is apparently working on graduating from college/getting his masters simulataneously and is of legal drinking age which some how nearly warped into a debate (in a very long and winding 6 person discussion) about welfare. I babysat that kid -- how is he old enough to be an adult?
Overall it was a great time home and for the first time I could actually envision myself moving there someday sooner rather than later. I felt a very real sense of depression as I flew away, which I had not gotten in a really long time. I don't know if that means that I am not really happy here in San Diego or if in my burgeoning maturity I wish to be nearer my parents or if my sense of not having a network of friends here in San Diego took over or if there is something else I don't get going on.

I do know that I was really sad that I did not have a friends to go out with when I got back that isn't the boy. Sometimes I want to talk about the boy to someone, but I don't really have the feeling that there is anyone here who would get it.

Now, school has started today and I have a ton of poop on my plate, so if you don't hear from me until May, I'm probably not dead, just on the verge of a psychotic break.

PS Golden Globes is the bestests!