So, I had some awesome friends in for the weekend which a) was fun, b) forced me to go to the beach (it was a real struggle to get me there), and c) was fun. Jocelyn, Sarah, and Winslow seemed to enjoy themselves, too. Which just means that my friends should all come visit me. Just try not to come all at once because with four there is room, five might be a squeeze, but I know that I have more than five friends so you wouldn't all fit.
I had forgotten what going out and being confident in yourself around the people you are with is like. Since having moved here to go to school, on the rare occasion that I go out, I never know if people find me fun/cool/entertaining/"insert other positive adjectives here" or if they tolerate me because I offer to drive sometimes. With true friends, like Jocelyn, Sarah and Winslow, I knew that they liked me for me and they know me well enough to tell me to do stuff, rummage through my refrigerator, call me weird, tolerate the fact that I say "there's my school" every time we pass it (about twenty times), and make me laugh. I felt truly at ease and really let myself enjoy it, even the hangover.
The best part, now that I've thought about it, was that we didn't spend the whole time reminiscing about the way things were or "remember that one time when...", not that we didn't do that, but that we spent a lot of time looking forward at our individual lives and at how our friendship has and will continue to change. I realized that I do miss them terribly, but I am also aware that even if I moved back to the east coast, it would not be the same as it ever was. We're all making new decision and thinking about the next five years in very different ways. We're all contemplating more long term decisions like careers, kids, marriage (if you're not already married), finding a place to live for longer than a year or two. Not that any one of us had answers but we certainly had questions.
We did "gossip" in that way that I found out how some of my friends I haven't seen and I never write are doing. I also got to share some updates about the first year DC crew, so I felt somewhat "in the know." That was good to hear about the further adventures of life as I used to know it. To those of you out there that I heard about: congratulations on the good stuff and good luck with the new stuff and try not to drive too fast. To those of you I got to give the update on: congratulations on the good stuff and good luck with the new stuff from Jocelyn, Sarah, and Winslow (if you've met him (which you may have but he's asked for anonymity on the internet)).
We also played poker. Jocelyn is extraordinarily lucky on deals, no matter what game you're playing. Don't play her for money. Winslow and Sarah play too much poker and know too many games so I never remember the rules to anything. This makes me a patsy. Play me for money.
We went out drinking, like for reals drinking. I got the hic-ups for about an hour, we played with a sharpie at the bar (Sarah to the waitress: "Where can we get good tattoos around here?", Waitress to Sarah after looking at the four of us in our sharpie splendor (mostly the others as I am too afraid of "permanent"): "You might want to stick to the sharpie."), we got bum rushed out with the heard at closing time, and the next day was a long process of recouping for some (my trash can misses you). Then we went to the beach. I think I could only do that once a quarter as I hate the hic-ups.
On Sunday, we went on the quest of the "Amusement Park" for Jocelyn and fish tacos for Winslow. Since I didn't take either of them to TJ to drink as expected (because that's what you do when you come to San Diego, right?), it was only right. The amusement park is really a boardwalk type area that has a roller coaster that was made of wood and built in the 1940s. It is just mellow enough that I liked it, but still no too boring for those with a greater sense of adventure. Then we went on the tilt-a-whirl and tried to take pictures of each other while the ride was in motion. Winslow said that made him feel like Saturday morning (not so good). Then we staggered away, me complaining of "neck pain" because I am getting old, and Sarah and Jocelyn managed to find a greasy taco place which served up some grub, including the long awaited fish tacos.
Then they left, and I felt sad. Then I started looking to see if there were reasonably priced apartments in the beach areas because I live near a McDonald's, the Vietnamese grocery, and my school. There are, so the next one to visit may have an easier time getting to the beach. Finding parking, however, is another matter.
In contrast, I went out with some folks from school last night (for a couple of beers and dinner) and I realized that while they were cool people that I genuinely like, I still feel guarded around them. This is a personal flaw that only I can fix. I cannot keep hoping that I will magically have friends like Jocelyn, Sarah, and Winslow because those friendships didn't just happen. It took time to get there and a willingness to expose my flaws to them and it was more then worth it.
And I still don't know where the salt from our table went...really, I have no idea.
